Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Jokes - Have A Good Laugh
Jokes - Some are Excellent
TEACHER : Why are you late?
BALGOBIN : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
BALGOBIN : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, why are you doing your math sums on the floor?
BALGOBIN : You told me to do it without using tables!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, how do you spell "crocodile"?
BALGOBIN : "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
BALGOBIN : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
BALGOBIN : "HIJKLMNO"!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
BALGOBIN : Yesterday you said it's H to O!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, go to the map and find North America .
BALGOBIN : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America ?
CLASS : Balgobin!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't have ten years ago.
BALGOBIN : Me!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, why do you always get so dirty?
BALGOBIN : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
BALGOBIN : Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER : I think so. What do you want me to write?
BALGOBIN : Your name on this report card.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
BALGOBIN : Don't bite any.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-**-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, give me a sentence starting with "I".
BALGOBIN : I is...
TEACHER : No, Balgobin. Always say, "I am."
BALGOBIN : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
BALGOBIN : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day,
same time."
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's
Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why
his father
didn't punish him?"
BALGOBIN : "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
BALGOBIN : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt ?
FATHER : No. Why do you ask that?
BALGOBIN : Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing,
one is green and one is blue with red spots!
BALGOBIN : Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like
that at home.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped
him, what virtue would I be showing?
BALGOBIN : Brotherly love?
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Now, Balgobin, tell me frankly do you say prayers before
eating?
BALGOBIN : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as
your brother's. Did you copy his?
BALGOBIN : No, teacher, it's the same dog!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people
are no longer interested?
BALGOBIN : A teacher
TEACHER : Why are you late?
BALGOBIN : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
BALGOBIN : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, why are you doing your math sums on the floor?
BALGOBIN : You told me to do it without using tables!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, how do you spell "crocodile"?
BALGOBIN : "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
BALGOBIN : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
BALGOBIN : "HIJKLMNO"!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
BALGOBIN : Yesterday you said it's H to O!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, go to the map and find North America .
BALGOBIN : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America ?
CLASS : Balgobin!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't have ten years ago.
BALGOBIN : Me!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, why do you always get so dirty?
BALGOBIN : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
BALGOBIN : Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER : I think so. What do you want me to write?
BALGOBIN : Your name on this report card.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
BALGOBIN : Don't bite any.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-**-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, give me a sentence starting with "I".
BALGOBIN : I is...
TEACHER : No, Balgobin. Always say, "I am."
BALGOBIN : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
BALGOBIN : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day,
same time."
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's
Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why
his father
didn't punish him?"
BALGOBIN : "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
BALGOBIN : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt ?
FATHER : No. Why do you ask that?
BALGOBIN : Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing,
one is green and one is blue with red spots!
BALGOBIN : Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like
that at home.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped
him, what virtue would I be showing?
BALGOBIN : Brotherly love?
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Now, Balgobin, tell me frankly do you say prayers before
eating?
BALGOBIN : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : Balgobin, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as
your brother's. Did you copy his?
BALGOBIN : No, teacher, it's the same dog!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people
are no longer interested?
BALGOBIN : A teacher
Continue only if u can stomach pictures of bodies....
A factory in Russia harvesting kidneys, eye corneas and other human body parts for sale.
Bodies are collected from drunk drivers who died in car accidents, people staying alone who had frozen to death in the cold winter, criminals on death row or unexplained death and unclaimed bodies. Some body parts and bones are sold to Universities in various parts of the world. Leg bones are exported to pharmacies in Ireland and Germany to make tooth-fillings which is popular in Europe .
Other that Russia , India is also known to harvest human parts for export
Child Kidnap Trick in Carrefour, JB
Even if you do not have little kids, pass this one on to everyone you
can think of. You never know who you might save by sending this e-mail!
Please, take the time and forward this to any friend who has children &
grandchildren! Thanks!
Wanted to share something that happened today while shopping at
Carrefour. A mother was leaning over looking for meat and turned around
to find her 4 years old daughter was missing. I was standing there right
beside her, and she was calling her daughter with no luck.
I asked a man who worked at Carrefour to announce it over the
loud-speaker. He did, and left me, he immediately walked right past me
when I asked and went to a pole where there was a phone. He made an
announcement for all the doors and gates to be locked, a code something.
So they locked all the doors at once.
This took all of 3 minutes after I asked the guy to do this. They found
the little girl 5 minutes later in a bathroom stall drugged .Her head
was half shaved, and she was dressed in her underwear with a bag of
clothes, a razor, and wig sitting on the floor beside her, to make her
look different.
Whoever this person was, took the little girl, brought her into the
bathroom, shaved half her head, and undressed her in a matter of less
than 10 minutes. This makes me shake to no end.
Please keep a close eye on your kids when in big places where it's easy
for you to get separated like Shopping Malls. It only took a few minutes
to do all of that. Another 5 minutes and she would have been out the
door.
I am still in shock that some sick person could do this, let alone in a
matter of minutes. The days are over when our little ones could run
rampant all over the place and nothing worse would happen then them
annoying people.
The little girl is fine. Thank God for fast workers who didn't take any
chances.
BE SURE TO FORWARD THIS TO EVERYONE, SO THEY REMEMBER JUST HOW SICK
PEOPLE ARE OUT THERE!
Legal Disclaimer:
The information contained in this message may be privileged and
confidential. It is intended to be read only by the individual or entity
to
whom it is addressed or by their designee. If the reader of this message
is
not the intended recipient, you are on notice that any distribution of
this
message, in any form, is strictly prohibited. If you have received this
message in error, please immediately notify the sender and delete or
destroy
any copy of this message
can think of. You never know who you might save by sending this e-mail!
Please, take the time and forward this to any friend who has children &
grandchildren! Thanks!
Wanted to share something that happened today while shopping at
Carrefour. A mother was leaning over looking for meat and turned around
to find her 4 years old daughter was missing. I was standing there right
beside her, and she was calling her daughter with no luck.
I asked a man who worked at Carrefour to announce it over the
loud-speaker. He did, and left me, he immediately walked right past me
when I asked and went to a pole where there was a phone. He made an
announcement for all the doors and gates to be locked, a code something.
So they locked all the doors at once.
This took all of 3 minutes after I asked the guy to do this. They found
the little girl 5 minutes later in a bathroom stall drugged .Her head
was half shaved, and she was dressed in her underwear with a bag of
clothes, a razor, and wig sitting on the floor beside her, to make her
look different.
Whoever this person was, took the little girl, brought her into the
bathroom, shaved half her head, and undressed her in a matter of less
than 10 minutes. This makes me shake to no end.
Please keep a close eye on your kids when in big places where it's easy
for you to get separated like Shopping Malls. It only took a few minutes
to do all of that. Another 5 minutes and she would have been out the
door.
I am still in shock that some sick person could do this, let alone in a
matter of minutes. The days are over when our little ones could run
rampant all over the place and nothing worse would happen then them
annoying people.
The little girl is fine. Thank God for fast workers who didn't take any
chances.
BE SURE TO FORWARD THIS TO EVERYONE, SO THEY REMEMBER JUST HOW SICK
PEOPLE ARE OUT THERE!
Legal Disclaimer:
The information contained in this message may be privileged and
confidential. It is intended to be read only by the individual or entity
to
whom it is addressed or by their designee. If the reader of this message
is
not the intended recipient, you are on notice that any distribution of
this
message, in any form, is strictly prohibited. If you have received this
message in error, please immediately notify the sender and delete or
destroy
any copy of this message
Special pictures
You're first - after me.
(This Only Happens in New York City )
And the SURGEON GENERAL says . . .
Diversionary tactic .
Words of Wisdom. [i love... this one]
A fortune to remember.
Stay off the course . . . or else!
Not my job
[my best]
(This Only Happens in New York City )
And the SURGEON GENERAL says . . .
Diversionary tactic .
Words of Wisdom. [i love... this one]
A fortune to remember.
Stay off the course . . . or else!
Not my job
[my best]
Working Mood Change.. hahaazz.. so cute!!]]]
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
]Last one is ultimate....
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Saturday & Sunday
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